On March 15, 2011 at 4:36 am, Ben's life changed forever. He was officially a big brother to our new family addition Alexis Lorraine. While he has known his sister was on his way for quite some time, I don't think he ever anticipated exactly what that would fully mean. Heck, I didn't even anticipate what that would fully mean. Sure I had more of the concept that a new being would enter our worlds, but to understand it means you need to experience it. It is sort of like not knowing the love you have for your child or the love your parents have for you until you actually have one of your own.
Ben officially met his sister on March 16th. He did not come the first day as his Mom was recuperating from some serious high blood pressure. He came into the hospital room (room 139) with his Nagymama (who picked him up from school) and his Nagypapa (who went outside to greet them). He was apprehensive, shy and a little unsure. I wasn't completely surprised by this but a little taken back as none of those adjectives are usually used to describe my son. He's usually very confident and loves to experience life at full speed. When he came in, I was holding his sister Alexis and told him to come up to me. I desperately wanted to snuggle both of my babies but I think the bed was a bit intimidating. He was okay to sit along side the bed in a chair and talk with me. He showed me a new shiny penny he had gotten and talked a little bit about school. He also told me how he can spell the word "bus" by singing the song, "the bus, the bus, the B-U -S". He was so sweet. To break the ice some more his Nagymama told him that perhaps he should give us some presents. He was quite excited about this and came over with cookies (three of them for him and his family) and a beautiful little plant that he had picked out. I then told him that we had a few things that Alexis wanted to give to him. He was given a few matchbox cars complete with a squad car, bus, helicopter and a few other vehicles and a spiderman coloring book. He was thrilled but still a bit shy. I decided to then hand off Alexis to his Nagymama so I could get some one on one time. We both sat down on a large chair and watched a movie for a little while. It was nice feeling close to him again and we held hands for a while. Soon enough Ben got a little more comfortable and started exploring the place. He had to check out the bathroom and then found empty cabinets. He was really thrilled when he was able to hide inside one cabinet which also contained thick plastic hangers. Hangers in Ben's world equals to "Captain Hooks" which he loves to play with. After a while it was time for him to go home. He told his Dad and I to come with him, but we obviously couldn't. It broke my heart that I couldn't go with him and after he left I did cry a bit. I missed my Ben. It was the longest time I have ever stayed away from him.
On our first day home, Ben was shy again at first but then was happy to be home with all of us once again. He really didn't bother too much with his sister but would every now and then look at her or ask where she went if one of us handed her off to the other parent. He also got to hold her, as he had requested months before she was even born if he could. He was gentle and caring. He held her for a few moments before asking politely if we could get her.
The following morning Ben was up on my bed and wanted to hold Alexis again. We complied but helped him of course. He was done within a few moments again. He then looked at his Dad and said, "Would you like to hold MY sister?" We both that was pretty amusing. He already staked his claim on her. The same day his Gaga came to visit in the evening. It was time for him to go to sleep and Gaga was holding her but she was about to also go home for the evening. Ben knew this, looked a bit worried and then told her very seriously, "You leave Alexis with Mommy". He was making sure his sister did not go anywhere. We all chuckled and reassured him she would not be going anywhere.
So far Ben has been doing great at home. He is being very sweet to his sister and constantly looking at her, holding her hand and has even given her a few kisses and hugs without being asked to. He still continues to do what Ben wants to do (which we want him to do that) but also has found a new sense of even greater sweetness for his tiny little sister. I'm amazed at his ability to adapt to such a huge change so easily and the fact he is willing to share his space with this new, tiny creature. I'm so proud of him and he already is such an awesome big brother.
I love you Ben!
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