It's A Girl!!!!

On Monday October 25th, my husband and I went in to the twenty week ultrasound (even though I was technically 18 weeks) to see our baby, make sure he/she is healthy and to HOPEFULLY find out the gender of the little person growing inside of me. I was so nervous and excited the night before about going to the ultrasound that I barely slept that night and was a bundle of nerves going into the appointment. THANK GOD I scheduled it for 9:30 in the morning. I would be a mess if I had to wait all day.

The technician we had was a very nice lady. I was glad for that because you never know who you may get walking in the door. You could get one negative tech on your hands or someone just having a bad day. She started right away first measuring my cervix, which I could thankfully empty out my bladder once she did those measurements. Next, she called in my husband so we could let the fun begin. If you have ever been pregnant, you know that each and every time you see or hear you baby it is one of the most reassuring sound/sight you will see. I then told the technician my apprehension of my baby being shy and not being able to find out the gender. She gave me a reassuring smile and told me we would find that. It did not matter to me if the baby was a boy or a girl. I didn't dream of having one versus the other. I just wanted a healthy baby and to just know.

She took about a million photos of the baby that day. The heart measured around 150 beats per minute. The baby weighed in at eight ounces. My due date didn't even change (due March 28th). Then we got the big news. She told us, "its a girl!" We were silent for a few seconds. It wasn't a disappointed silence or a angry silence. It was a "Um, what?" silence. Obviously we knew we could have either one but I guess since we have a boy we were kind of shocked/surprised. I smiled. A tear streamed down my face. I was going to have a little girl. My husband smiled at me as our eyes met. Our little Ben had been right all along. He was going to have a sister. My husband and I joked during the rest of the ultrasound about different things like her playing hockey and that she'd be the cute little girl out there with pink laces on her skates. It was a fun experience and I walked away still a little stunned, but glowing. My baby was healthy and the fear of not being able to find out quickly dissipated into thinking "girl".

The shock of it all is still wearing in even after telling the world what we were having. I think having lived in an all male household with even the dogs being boys is maybe why I'm so perplexed that there will be another female in the house besides me. I don't really distinguish doing girl things vs. boy things with my son, but I know there will be a time when things may change to doing more boy stereotypical things with my son versus girl stereotypical things that I will do with my daughter. Maybe she'll like the American Girl dolls and want to have a girly tea party when she gets a little older. I doubt my son in a few years will really be interested in playing dress up the dollies with Mom and having dainty tea parties. He would always be invited though! I also can't very well dress up my son in little hair bows and ribbons and the same goes for my girl in not being able to dress her up in little old man suits, but she will certainly rock out hockey jerseys! Both will have a lot of similarities in the way of being taught, how to act, etc., I want my girl to be just as independent as my little boy is. I want my boy to know how to do just as many little domesticated duties as my girl will know how to do. I also will encourage sports and academics. In all, I want to raise my children to be healthy, independent, God and people loving, educated individuals.

We Are Pregnant!

First Photo 8 Weeks Old

I found out the Saturday before my birthday that I was pregnant. James and I just came home from a party and I decided...why not? Needless to say, I was shocked but ecstatic to see two VERY clear pink lines. I came downstairs and handed the test to my James. He at that point was used to seeing one liners even though we would squint in hopes of seeing a second line. He didn't need to squint. I can remember his face clear as day...surprised, almost a bit shocked from months prior and asked me "REALLY?!!!!!" We told Ben, but he really had no reaction at that point, which is expected of a three year old.

That Sunday we told both of the parents. My parents picked me up for church, and unlike most days, I asked if they could come inside. James told them and they were so excited! I did let my Dad tell the priest. It was the Sunday that Ben thought Father John's name needed to be blessed like the sign of the cross, "Father, John, Holy Spirit" instead of "Father, Son, Holy, Spirit". Later that evening we told my James'sMom and her boyfriend. The boyfriend got it when James said that Ben was going to have a brother or a sister. James'sMom initially thought we were just telling her we were trying, and was so excited to hear that we were actually pregnant.

Ben is the sweetest little guy of them all about this pregnancy. In the past few months he has become accustomed to knowing that Mommy has a baby in her belly. He even thinks he has a baby in his belly too sometimes too. We talk about the baby. He tells me how he's going to be nice to the baby and share, although he did state that he would NOT share his bath toys. That is fine with me for a while since the two won't be sharing baths initially. He also told me he would share his old crib and points out that the nursery is the baby's room and his room is the one next to it. He even makes it a point now to say "hi" to other babies when we are out in public.

I will also say, that neither his Dad nor I care what sex the baby is. I think most people are a little surprised to hear that, but honestly we just want a healthy baby. If we have another boy, then great because we know boys and Ben will have a brother. If we have a girl, then great because we will get another type of experience raising a girl and Ben will have a sister. However, when we have asked Ben if he is going to have a brother or a sister, he always replies with "swister". He has never deviated from that. I have told him a sister means a girl and a brother is a boy, but he is adamant that it is a girl. So we will see if my little predictor is correct when we hopefully find out at the end of October.

Lastly, I thought maybe I would feel different when I got the sonogram (pictured above). I have already experienced sonograms with my first pregnancy and even though I obviously think this baby is a miracle and it is such a blessing, I almost thought I would be used to it. What a silly notion! The moment I saw my baby, my heart fluttered and I could not stop tearing up. Hearing the heart beat (a steady 170 bpm) was amazing. It was the first time I got a glimpse of my baby, my second child, my Ben's sibling. I was in complete awe and truly humbled.

Babies will come when they want to and honestly, even with all the stress and new beginnings going on in my life, it was the perfect timing. There are some hurdles to jump and new things to figure out, but life is forever changing and I'm so happy that God has blessed me with another child, a sibling for my son. This pregnancy has been hard with feeling nausea and having multiple migraines in my first trimester, but it has also humbled me too. I would rather feel healthy in some respect, but I almost am glad that I don't feel terribly well because for me its a sign the baby is fine. It certainly is a completely different pregnancy then what I experienced with my first, but it is still just as amazing and pretty awesome.

Thank you God. I could never thank you enough for all the blessings you have given me.